Published on March 24th, 2015 | by John Locke0
MAN IS NOT WITHOUT WOMAN, NOR WOMAN, MAN, IN THE LORD
Adam lay on a bed of soft moss, waking from a deep sleep. He sat up, running his hands through his hair. How long had he slept? Then, his eyes focused, staring above him, his gaze resting upon a wonderful sight, one he had never before witnessed. A woman creature, skin smooth and without blemish, hair falling to her shoulders. An incredible vision, something entirely new to the Garden. This he knew, because Adam had named and counted all the animals of the Garden. But this woman-creature standing before him was something, he knew, far more important, and infinitely more intriguing.
This was a game-changer.
Eve bent low next to him and smiled, and his entire world, the perfect world of the Garden, which God had given him alone, was now forgotten in a heartbeat. For in this willing, receptive face he saw what might be, and in the gleam in her eye, a promise, eternal.
From this encounter from our archaic past, the first of its kind on earth, I believe, man and woman began to truly understand what God had intended for them and for their posterity. In this single epiphany, man and woman completed each other. Their future, in this life and the next, was set in motion by God, their Father, their Creator.
Soon enough they became one flesh, partnering with God “to multiply and replenish the earth.” Man was the life-force and woman, by design, his equal partner, lover, and friend. She was, by nature, drawn unto him, knowing that what would come from their physical, and spiritual union, would be their legacy, and God’s heritage. (Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord; and the fruit of the womb is his reward—Psalm 127:3.)
We know from a long, detailed world history, however, what happens when men, or women, have attempted to short-circuit what God had designed and set in motion from the beginning. People suffer and civilizations decay and die, in reality, rotting from within.
Why? Because this sacred life-force is then counterfeited for purely selfish ends. The God-given power to procreate, a power that will be magnified exponentially by God in the celestial eternities, is degraded and used as a means to compromise another for selfish means, for self-gratification, the partner’s needs considered only secondary, or not at all. What could be more destructive? How many of us in our lives have felt this effect, or observed it in others?
You may look at the story of Adam and Eve as fact, or purely allegorical or symbolic, I don’t care. What’s important, I believe, is the message, one that resounds in each of our hearts, one that changes lives for the better, one that builds, not destroys.
When I was a Mormon Missionary long ago, my companion and I met a young man, about 25 years old, who had what many would view as the “dream job.” He was a handyman and grounds-keeper in an all-girls finishing school. A very liberal finishing school, located in El Paso, Texas. We’ll call him Ed (not his real name). This was a post-high school, private academy for young women. Wealthy young women, most in their late teens and early twenties, most of them beautiful, and as far as I could tell, quite bored with life. Ed, a handsome, well-built guy, lived in a one-room cottage at the rear of the walled and beautifully landscaped school grounds—large, ancient oaks, rhododendron bushes, dogwoods, a southern plantation-like atmosphere. Rarely did we visit Ed that he didn’t have at least one young lady with him in his cottage. What was even more amazing was that, according to Ed, the school manager, a middle-aged woman, left him and his extra-curricular activities, alone, as long as he was “discreet.” In any case, Ed told me that when landing this job, he thought he’d “died and gone to heaven.” “A different girl every night, two on weekends.” Not without conscience, however, Ed always assured me that he always got his work done first, but more so, was careful to treat the girls “with respect, and with gentleness.” After all, he told me, “I have standards, you know.”
“Standards.” He even managed that with a straight face.
Ed wanted us to teach him the gospel, so we did. But, predictably, he had some difficulty when we got to the “Law of Chastity” section. After that, Ed didn’t want to see us anymore.
I’ve thought much about Ed, that surreal school and surrounding gardens, and what had gone on there many years ago when I was a young, naïve, impressionable missionary. Sometimes my imagination would run wild and I’d have to rein it in. The actions, the frenetic hook-ups in this enchanting garden-school, in contrast to the Garden of our first parents. Needless to say, striking.
Over time, however, I admit that my perspective on this experience has changed, though not in the way you might think.
Obviously, the sexual mores of our day continue to evolve, though not so much regarding heterosexual relationships. That’s been on a roller coaster to hell since the 1960s. Mostly, today, however, regarding homosexual activity. With the changes, however, have come the risks, which grow exponentially day by day. Few disagree with that statement. Where the disagreement comes, I believe, is the assessment of the consequences—physical, emotional, and moral.
- THE BIG LIE
I believe that the above “discreet” activity, over time, has affected Ed’s, and each young lady’s, life and relationships, and in most cases, I don’t believe for the better. We all know that such unbridled activity, no matter how “gentle,” jades a person’s heart and burnishes his or her soul. Why? Because it strikes at the core of the eternal, God-given relationship between man and woman, a relationship that I believe began before we were born, and continues into the eternities. More troubling, society today encourages young, single people to enjoy life, to have “safe sex.” This is the Big Lie today, one fed us everywhere we turn.
In a nutshell, here’s why:
Since Adam and Eve left the Garden and entered the real world, sex has never been safe. It was never meant to be. It is a powerful physical and spiritual act of choice, the ultimate God-given choice, in reality, that can have life-changing, eternal consequences on the participants. When a man and a woman, for example, choose to bed down together, a whole array of physical, spiritual, and emotional powers are unleashed, nearly all the people of today choose to ignore. Still, the sex act between two uncommitted individuals—in effect, strangers—can do great harm, and often does.
Obviously, going to bed with a diseased partner can be fatal, or debilitating. A quick “hook-up” these days is just plain stupid. And opening yourself up to a narcissist, a sexual pervert, a stalker, or worse, is insane. No amount of personal pleasure can compensate for the evil that could come your way, or the guilt and worry that will follow. And in such a relationship, if a baby is created, what then? No, it makes no sense to call such “encounters” anything but reckless abandon with one of the most powerful forces, for good or evil, in the universe. Makes Russian Roulette a parlor game by comparison.
- THE SEX IN THE CITY CROWD
Tell me, please, how you call this “good” or even valuable? How do you enjoy it? The man who sleeps with his wife and sweetheart of many years enjoys sex. The wife who is made love to by her husband of 40 years, a man who cherishes her and knows how to please her, enjoys sex. The two are coming together with affection, trust, passion, loyalty and love, gifting that partner special pleasure as his or her prime objective. Such are committed; they know each other and want the other to be safe and secure, to be cherished and respected. This is honesty, this is real. It’s not something they will have to cover up or lie about.
You want to know the truth? The Sex In the City crowd, in reality, is doing everything it can to avoid true and honest sex. Such people are frauds, and they are cowards. In essence, such fear the genuine article and do everything possible to avoid it.
I miss talking to Ed. Haven’t seen the kid for many years. But I hope he’s found happiness in his life, with that special someone, somewhere. And I hope he’s found his courage. Though I often wonder, when the topic comes up about past romances, if Ed confides with his wife, with his sweetheart, the woman who has born his children, about the “days of yore,” when his greatest challenge each day was remembering the name of the past night’s young, innocent “pleasure.”
After all, if nothing else, Ed has standards.